That’s some glamour shot – Not at all! Notice to the two tone jeans. Oh well, the friendship is 30 years and going strong, so I’ll take the bad photographic evidence that goes along with it.
My choice of school classes has me saying, “Hi, Idiot!” to my adult self. Growing up, I was usually in advanced classes. I was nowhere near the smartest kid in my class – I tended to do very well in classes I liked and average in the ones I didn’t.
I remember my freshman year of high school we all had to sample a different elective each quarter, like cooking, sewing and drama. We got to make a pair of sweatpants in sewing that, after cutting into shorts in college, I finally threw out a few years ago. Though I was proud of my sweatpants, I went through that obligatory year and then decided not to take any more of “those classes” after that. All electives I chose were more academic, blah blah blah.
I had a chip on my shoulder that no way deserved to be there. I looked down on classes like cooking and shop. And you know what!? Firstly, it’s not like I can tell you many / any specifics from whatever classes I did take. And Secondly – As an adult, I was the A-hole who couldn’t cook.
If I could do high school over, not that I’m itching to dive into that time machine back to big hair, Aussie Sprunch Spray and Outback Red, I would take as many as those life preparatory classes as possible. Cooking – Yes, for sure though I will say, a random bonus of cancer and being home all the time, was that my cooking skills improved. But we’re talking from 0 to maybe 40%. Sewing – Sounds good but this would be lower on my list. Shop – Yes! I actually love to build things. I have successfully put together many pieces of furniture with a trusty allen wrench. To have real skills in this department would be great. I actually think my school also had an auto repair class. I’d totally take that!
If I Only Knew Then…
I put this together!
Yes, I can learn some of this stuff now and I have and enjoy it. I just wish I’d had any kind of scope back then for actual life. An appreciation for the day in day out stuff. The stuff I didn’t ponder or took for granted growing up. The good stuff – stuff that matters.
I have noticed going through cancer that I’ve had a rebirth in myself to get some skills and definitely more appreciation in these areas. Perhaps as I continue to Grow Bolder, I’ll actually get good at some of these! From a person whose meals now taste okay though often look like hell, it’s hard to imagine. But at least I now, finally, have the right attitude that my younger self could have really used (along with a swift kick in the behind.)
Ain’t nothing gonna break my stride
By the way, if you’re ever in Boston and super lucky, you can see Jed in an act of actual, physical momentum. His “Living on a Prayer” at karaoke is legendary! Some of the pics are from our annual tradition of going to the mall at Christmas and recreating model poses for our own enjoyment / amusement.
At the end of July, I moved more towards Orlando. It was very interesting driving away from Gainesville the night of the 30th. I was exhausted from the move and the cleaning and had the three cats in the car in two cages, which they never like – I was stressed. Yet, I was relieved. It just felt right to be driving away. Driving away from a place that, though I’m sooo eternally grateful for, really was all about cancer and not much of a life.
They are a cast of characters, a bit like Heart of Dixie from the quirky not the southern, but I loved that show and I love these folks. It’s nice to be welcomed into a fold where everyone thought of me during my surgeries and greets me whenever they see me with big, warm hugs and home cooking that well exceeds my skill set. 🙂
I was alone pretty much all the time. But I was also supported from a distance by many. Hence alone but together. I do need to give huge credit to social media. I was vocal about my situation and gave updates when big things happened. I remember the first time I posted, it was just before my first surgery and I reached out and fessed up to cancer and to being a little scared. Oh my word, I heard from 700+ people from every walk of my lifetime, wishing me well. Talk about feeling enveloped in love – even if it’s not in the form of physical embrace. I will never forget all of those who supported me. Look – they sent stuff too!
My mom and good friend, Amy, were always there at each surgery and my good friend, Mary, took great care of me after my double. My friend, Dave, made sure I got out or had company at least once a week. My kitties were a constant presence of unconditional love. And, you’ve gotta love where your knights in shining armor come from. I lived in downtown Gainesville. Where I parked had a car wash and those guys checked in on me every time they saw me. They helped me carry groceries, washed my car for free a couple of times, and were just there with big smiles and words of encouragement. There were valet guys who stood outside my building who always got the door for me and asked how they could help. There were also the managers and chefs at Dragonfly, a fantastic sushi place, who always checked in on me and gave a smile or wave or kind word.
Really, the more (most) important question is, do we need to know most / all of the answers to Grow Bolder? I’m leaning towards no. What I do know, pondering such things can eat up a lot of time and lead to justifications of action and inaction. I’m just picturing large mouthfuls, like those random eat a steak the size of your head in an hour competitions, and maybe we can just take this one bite of time and get rid of the clock.
Aside from being a daughter and sister, I’m also a sister-in-law and aunt. Shout out to my bro-fam – Tracy, Casey and Ryan as well as Karen’s family – Alan, Mariska and Michael. I love being an aunt and love that between the four there’s an age spread so I can hear about all different types of life stage happenings. Everyone is strewn about the East coast, so I mostly see them for major holidays. I wish I saw them all more often than I do.
